Tue, 01 Jul 2008 20:18:15 +0200 admin@HIMclub.com (HIMclub.com) IP.Blog 60
Been very bored at work and have a lot going on through my mind so I figure what better place to rant and write then here .

Yes, as the title states, I recently returned from rehab. I know, quite an ironic feat, considering I'm [still] in the Navy. It wasn't for drugs, had it been, I would be in the process of being processed out. It was due to a growing alcohol addiction that started since before I even joined the Navy. It grew in intensity with my enterring into A School after boot camp; though, after being sent to my first duty station of Japan, all drinking hell broke loose. I was and still am very unhappy with my stay here, and am currently in the works of trying to get transferred back to the states as I speak. This drove me to nearly-nightly drinking for almost 6 months straight, give and take off course underway periods. The ball did not completely drop until the departing of my ex-fiance, who (unlucky to the both of us while we were still together) was stationed in San Diego out of A School. Many of you might claim this was a very dumb, if not illegitimate, reason to drink so much- but we all have our different ways of dealing with our troubles. It was after a near alcohol poisoning that I decided to get help. My chief is luckily our command's DAPA (Drug and Alcohol Program Assistant) and he was able to get me sent to the Navy's rehab as soon as was physically possible from Japan (seeing as the treatment I needed was located back in the states). That was almost exactly a month, and then I was off to a secluded Naval Base for treatment. The month I was there helped me very much, and gave me different ways to help myself- seeing as AA Meetings and Alcohol Help groups are relatively hard to come by here.

Though, the main troubles in my head right now have all come forth since my return back to Japan. For some odd reason, I have been getting in more trouble sober than I ever even managed to get in while I was drinking heavily. I guess that's why they call quite a few alcoholics "Functioning Drunks"- meaning that they can do everything to get by through their daily lives while still drinking almost daily. As many reasons as I gained through treatment not to drink, since my return their affects have faded away and driven me back to wanting to drink. I admit the problems are caused by my own actions, but yet I feel as if I've been trying to make things work the best I can when these incidents have happened. It also pushes me even more to try and escape this God-awful duty station, my guess is that back in the states I will be much happier and therefore be able to function to a needed capacity again.

Well my ranting is done, thanks for reading!]]> Tue, 01 Jul 2008 10:22:00 +0200